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Here is my try. Cheers!

Sounds like you have done a pretty good job ,the backing vocals sound nice and balanced.
The main thing that jumps out to me is the percussion and hi hat maybe could come down a touch.

It is true that hh could be a bit down, as well as some parts of drumming, but I am pleased with fisrt part of your comment so I won't read further :-) Thank you for kind words, specially concidering that I find your mix almost great :-)