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acoustic intro test
07-11-2019, 03:09 PM (This post was last modified: 07-11-2019 03:36 PM by [email protected].)
Post: #1
acoustic intro test
mix with headphones and need a lot more of automatization on the vocals and maybe a different revb or add a long one. just testing a different intro. please comment.


.mp3   intro editada5.mp3 --  (Download: 7 MB)


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10-11-2019, 04:15 PM
Post: #2
RE: acoustic intro test
An interesting idea but may be too busy. It overwhelms the vocal. Maybe drop the guitar a bar earlier and dry up the vocal then automate the vocal effects as more instruments build the ensemble. It builds and sits nicely after that. Just an idea.

PreSonus Studio One DAW
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10-11-2019, 04:39 PM
Post: #3
RE: acoustic intro test
It's funny because unless I'm mistaken those are just all the parts that are there without the drums/bass in the intro. It's funny how a mix can make a song feel busy or empty with the same instruments. I think it It does show there's a better song underneath the rlathersafe and bland traditional original version.

Yeah this mix is off but I do like the feeling of this version better in some ways. At least at first.

Sorry, I'm mostly angry that he uses the word 'eyes' twice in the second verse when 'sigh' could have replaced one of them. It's lazy and comes across as dismissive to the story and listener. It doesn't come across as passionate but 'good enough' I just got issues with this one and had to listen to it too much, is all.

I only have earbuds to listen and mix with at the moment. Take everything I say with a grain of salt.
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Don't mix for other mixers.
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10-11-2019, 05:31 PM (This post was last modified: 10-11-2019 05:31 PM by Mixinthecloud.)
Post: #4
RE: acoustic intro test
(10-11-2019 04:39 PM)RoyMatthews Wrote:  It's funny because unless I'm mistaken those are just all the parts that are there without the drums/bass in the intro. It's funny how a mix can make a song feel busy or empty with the same instruments. I think it It does show there's a better song underneath the rlathersafe and bland traditional original version.

Yeah this mix is off but I do like the feeling of this version better in some ways. At least at first.

Sorry, I'm mostly angry that he uses the word 'eyes' twice in the second verse when 'sigh' could have replaced one of them. It's lazy and comes across as dismissive to the story and listener. It doesn't come across as passionate but 'good enough' I just got issues with this one and had to listen to it too much, is all.

Roy,
Funny you should take issue with some of the lyrics here. I do too, but not the same ones. Mine is with how much time he 'buys'. And more than that, he 'buys' it for himself and not for the we or the us. As a result, it gets a little self-serving and self-pitying when the opportunity to emphasize the 'we' in this context is lost even though it is supposedly about her or them. A few simple changes to the lyric would have been more effective at carrying the 'we' emotional sentiment. This is tearing them apart and not just how much he buys himself time with her. It is for them because that is what is truly being lost. OK. Rant over.

PreSonus Studio One DAW
on RDS Server with Dante Via (ask for details)
[email protected]


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10-11-2019, 05:43 PM
Post: #5
RE: acoustic intro test
(10-11-2019 05:31 PM)Mixinthecloud Wrote:  
(10-11-2019 04:39 PM)RoyMatthews Wrote:  It's funny because unless I'm mistaken those are just all the parts that are there without the drums/bass in the intro. It's funny how a mix can make a song feel busy or empty with the same instruments. I think it It does show there's a better song underneath the rlathersafe and bland traditional original version.

Yeah this mix is off but I do like the feeling of this version better in some ways. At least at first.

Sorry, I'm mostly angry that he uses the word 'eyes' twice in the second verse when 'sigh' could have replaced one of them. It's lazy and comes across as dismissive to the story and listener. It doesn't come across as passionate but 'good enough' I just got issues with this one and had to listen to it too much, is all.

Roy,
Funny you should take issue with some of the lyrics here. I do too, but not the same ones. Mine is with how much time he 'buys'. And more than that, he 'buys' it for himself and not for the we or the us. As a result, it gets a little self-serving and self-pitying when the opportunity to emphasize the 'we' in this context is lost even though it is supposedly about her or them. A few simple changes to the lyric would have been more effective at carrying the 'we' emotional sentiment. This is tearing them apart and not just how much he buys himself time with her. It is for them because that is what is truly being lost. OK. Rant over.

Yeah, I didn't want to go into it too much but why spend that same amount of time in the car ride? I understand the ritual but still. It doesn't extend anything. And yeah, even the doctor comes up to him and even talks to him directly "I'm sorry man..." I get the reality in a hospital can be weird and one person could be in treatment or testing and the doctor talks to the spouse but in the lyric it's weak. It feels weird.

You once mentioned to think about it like it's his dog and it almost makes more sense to look at it that way. I think the most emotional part of the song is the waltz time.

I only have earbuds to listen and mix with at the moment. Take everything I say with a grain of salt.
-
Don't mix for other mixers.
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10-11-2019, 08:49 PM
Post: #6
RE: acoustic intro test
(10-11-2019 05:43 PM)RoyMatthews Wrote:  
(10-11-2019 05:31 PM)Mixinthecloud Wrote:  
(10-11-2019 04:39 PM)RoyMatthews Wrote:  It's funny because unless I'm mistaken those are just all the parts that are there without the drums/bass in the intro. It's funny how a mix can make a song feel busy or empty with the same instruments. I think it It does show there's a better song underneath the rlathersafe and bland traditional original version.

Yeah this mix is off but I do like the feeling of this version better in some ways. At least at first.

Sorry, I'm mostly angry that he uses the word 'eyes' twice in the second verse when 'sigh' could have replaced one of them. It's lazy and comes across as dismissive to the story and listener. It doesn't come across as passionate but 'good enough' I just got issues with this one and had to listen to it too much, is all.

Roy,
Funny you should take issue with some of the lyrics here. I do too, but not the same ones. Mine is with how much time he 'buys'. And more than that, he 'buys' it for himself and not for the we or the us. As a result, it gets a little self-serving and self-pitying when the opportunity to emphasize the 'we' in this context is lost even though it is supposedly about her or them. A few simple changes to the lyric would have been more effective at carrying the 'we' emotional sentiment. This is tearing them apart and not just how much he buys himself time with her. It is for them because that is what is truly being lost. OK. Rant over.

Yeah, I didn't want to go into it too much but why spend that same amount of time in the car ride? I understand the ritual but still. It doesn't extend anything. And yeah, even the doctor comes up to him and even talks to him directly "I'm sorry man..." I get the reality in a hospital can be weird and one person could be in treatment or testing and the doctor talks to the spouse but in the lyric it's weak. It feels weird.

You once mentioned to think about it like it's his dog and it almost makes more sense to look at it that way. I think the most emotional part of the song is the waltz time.

Yup. the lyrics would make more sense if he was talking about his dog. When I heard it was about the struggles a friend of his went through with his wife, it stung a little. Still, the structure and melodic and rhythmic content and the arrangement of the song are really good. It's a tear-jerker and I will not impugn David for a poor choice of words here and there. It is far better than anything I could do.

PreSonus Studio One DAW
on RDS Server with Dante Via (ask for details)
[email protected]


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10-11-2019, 08:58 PM
Post: #7
RE: acoustic intro test
Meh, yeah. I can't say I'd create something better from scratch, obviously, but I do see the weaknesses and I think a quality producer would have taken this basic overall song and broken it down and helped too to create a better song. I feel like we tend to tip toe around it because the subject matter and I get that. But I also feel like because of that it should be more solid and respectful to the subject. It's a hallmark card at this point. Obvious but vapid. I do like the time signature. It evokes a dance between two people. Lyrically though it could be stronger.

Not that David Tyo will ever read this but just in case I mean no disrespect but still stand by it. For such a broad and obvious weighty subject a lazy and passing, 6/10 song will get you some points but over time give it more respect.

It's ok, I'm used to being in the doghouse. I stand by my criticism of this song about a cancer patient's partner's sadness.

I only have earbuds to listen and mix with at the moment. Take everything I say with a grain of salt.
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Don't mix for other mixers.
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09-12-2019, 12:52 AM
Post: #8
RE: acoustic intro test
thanks for the review... is been a while and i dropped it for a new one.
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